[3142] in Humor
Fwd: Fw: Useful English System Conversions
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Beth Dubeck)
Thu Mar 23 12:44:08 2000
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2000 12:30:20 -0500
To: humor@MIT.EDU, jbenincasa@sprynet.com, CCaaders@aol.com, cmccall@bu.edu,
David.T.McCall.9@nd.edu, oymrome@dreamscape.com, pbdubeck@CYBERNEX.NET,
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From: Beth Dubeck <bdubeck@MIT.EDU>
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>Subject: Fwd: Fw: Useful English System Conversions
>Date: Wed, 22 Mar 2000 17:30:32 MST
>
>
>
>
> >
> >Useful English System conversions/units:
> >
> >Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter: Eskimo Pi
> >
> >2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University
> >Hospital: 1 I.V. League
> >
> >2000 pounds of Chinese soup: Won ton
> >
> >1 millionth mouthwash: 1 microscope
> >
> >Speed of a tortoise breaking the sound barrier: Mach Turtle
> >
> >Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour:
> >Knot-furlong
> >
> >365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling:
> >1 lite year
> >
> >16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone: 1 Rod Sterling
> >
> >Half of a large intestine: 1 semicolon
> >
> >1000 aches: 1 megahurtz
> >
> >Weight an evangelist carries with God: 1 billigram
> >
> >Basic unit of laryngitis: 1 hoarsepower
> >
> >Shortest distance between two jokes: A straight line
> >
> >Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement:
> >bananosecond
> >
> >A Half-Bath: 1 demijohn
> >
> >453.6 graham crackers: 1 pound cake
> >
> >Given the old adage "a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single
> >step",
> >the first step of a one-mile journey:
> >1 Milwaukee
> >
> >1 million microphones: 1 megaphone
> >
> >1 million bicycles: 2 megacycles
> >
> >365.25 days: 1 unicycle
> >
> >2200 mockingbirds: two kilomockingbirds
> >
> >10 cards: 1 decacards
> >
> >1 kilogram of falling figs: 1 Fig Newton
> >
> >1000 grams of wet socks: 1 literhosen
> >
> >1 millionth of a fish: 1 microfiche
> >
> >1 trillion pins: 1 terrapin
> >
> >1 million billion picolos: 1 gigolo
> >
> >10 rations: 1 decoration
> >
> >100 rations: 1 C-ration
> >
> >10 millipedes: 1 centipede
> >
> >3 1/3 tridents: 1 decadent
> >
> >10 monologs: 5 dialogs
> >
> >5 dialogs: 1 decalog
> >
> >2 monograms: 1 diagram
> >
> >8 nickels: 2 paradigms
> >
> >2 wharves: 1 paradox
> >
> >100 Senators: Not 1 decision
> >
> >
>
>
>
>
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