[30] in Humor
Some days I get the strangest things in the mail...
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (jdhinter@MIT.EDU)
Wed Jan 26 21:57:55 1994
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Cc: lanaimal@MIT.EDU, sniemczy@MIT.EDU, hrreimer@MIT.EDU, mariadf@MIT.EDU,
Date: Wed, 26 Jan 94 21:55:24
From: jdhinter@MIT.EDU
I opened my AT&T phone bill today, which looked much different from all of
their previous bills, and read the following:
> YOU ASKED FOR IT -- YOU GOT IT
>
>The new bill format is here. Our thanks to all of you who gave us
>suggestions on making this a more user-friendly bill.
First of all, I didn't even know that they had been taking suggestions, and
I certainly didn't ask for "IT" -- I was perfectly happy with the old bill
format.
Secondly, the only suggestion I have (after the fact) is that not billing
me at all would be "more user-friendly," but for some reason I can't see
that going over very well.
>You'll find your account summary in the boxes below on this front page.
>Call detail and other charges appear on the reverse side of this first
>page of the bill and may continue on to additional pages if needed.
If the bill is so "user-friendly" as it claims, why does it come with
instructions for reading it??
>We're using duplex printing, saving paper by using both sides, supporting
>our mission to help save the environment.
Most of my old bills came on one sheet anyway, but okay. It's the '90s,
it's P.C., helping the environment is cool, and in the words of a very
close friend of mine, WHATEVER.
>Another great feature is the expanded messaging capability you see here on
>the front page. LOOK HERE EACH MONTH FOR IMPORTANT SERVICE INFORMATION,
>FUN FACTS AND SAVINGS OPPORTUNITIES!
FUN FACTS???!!!! What the {explitive deleted, but I'm sure you can
guess...} are FUN FACTS?!! It's a bill, for crying out loud. What
possible FUN FACTS could there be about a phone bill?!!
In addition, I have never seen them offer savings opportunities on a bill
before, and I have been getting them for quite a while now. Besides, by
the time they send you the bill, isn't it too late to realize that, for
example, calling 5 minutes later would have saved you 7 cents a minute?!!
I'm sorry, but that's how I see it.
Jason
