[98214] in tlhIngan-Hol
Re: [Tlhingan-hol] The Legend of Gorath part 3
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Rohan Fenwick)
Sat Mar 22 23:58:09 2014
From: Rohan Fenwick <qeslagh@hotmail.com>
To: "tlhingan-hol@kli.org" <tlhingan-hol@kli.org>
Date: Sun, 23 Mar 2014 13:57:52 +1000
In-Reply-To: <8D1145C39E8A89E-1C18-48A9B@webmail-vm033.sysops.aol.com>
Errors-To: tlhingan-hol-bounces@kli.org
ghItlhpu' gheyIl, jatlh:
> Grandfather: Later, as Gorath ate with his family, he told the story of =
> the ambush.
> vavnI': SIbI'Ha' SoptaHvIS ghoratlh qorDu'Daj je ghachpu' cha' nIHwI' ja'=
. =
Again, punctuation would help you out, to make it clear that it was not Gor=
ath AND his family that were being ambushed (they could be serving as the o=
bject of {ghach} here).
Also, you're missing an {'e'} in there - {ghachpu' cha' nIHwI' 'e' ja'} "he=
said that two thieves had ambushed him".
=A0
taH:
> Gorath: =85then, they attacked. I stood my ground. =
> ghoratlh: =85vaj muHIv. jIHeDbe'. =
For "then", you'd be better off going for {ghIq} "then, subsequently" or {n=
gugh} "then, at that time"; I don't think {vaj} quite works here.
(poD vay')
> Gorath: Four of them. Tall and strong. Twenty of them. I wasted no time =
> in teaching them a lesson or two. I spun left. I turned right. Swinging =
> my betleH with all of my strength to fend them off. =
> ghoratlh: loS tu'lu'. runbe'qu' 'ej HoS.
We do have the nicely appropriate verb {woch} "be tall" (HQ 13:1).
(poD vay')
> cha'maH tu'lu'. jIHvo' nom Doch puS ghoj chaH. poSDaq jIDIng. nIHDaq
> jItlhe'. betleHwIj vIDIngmeH HoSwIj Hoch {1} vIlo' 'ej vI'ompu'.
I have no problems with {HoSwIj Hoch}, and it's the structure I find myself=
using most often. Some speakers prefer {HoSwIj naQ}, but it's a matter of =
style rather than of grammar (both are grammatically correct).
> Barwench: And they didn=92t land a single blow. =
> tebwI': 'ej not nImup'a'?
Maybe perfective would be better here: {not nImuppu''a'}.
> Gorath: Not a scratch. I was too fast, too agile, too deadly for the =
> likes of them. More bloodwine. =
> ghoratlh: jIrIQHa'chu'.
{rIQHa'} implies that he was injured but became well. {jIrIQbe'chu'} - perh=
aps even with a continuous suffix to emphasise it, {jIrIQbe'chu'taH} - woul=
d be better for implying that he was not injured at all by them.
> pe'vIl roS jIvang.
Hrm. The purpose of {roS} here isn't clear; it doesn't relate to anything e=
lse in the sentence syntactically.
Just my two cents, but I'd tend to render your sentence with nouns rather t=
han verbs; "I was too fast, too agile, too deadly for the likes of them" go=
es well into something like this:
SIQmeH Seghchaj 'Iq DowIj, 'Iq laHwIj, 'Iq QobwIj
"my speed was too much, my ability was too much, my danger was too much for=
their type to endure"
> jIH po' law' chaH po' puS. =
> {2} 'Iw HIq latlh! =
(poD vay')
> {2} I couldn't think of anything better for "deadly/lethal" ... perhaps =
> <Qob> ? =
{Qob} is a good recasting, I think.
> Grandfather: It wsn=92t long before stories of his exploits reached the =
> powerful House of Bronal. =
> vavnI': tugh bIro'nal {3} tuq HoSghaj SIchpu' chavHeyDaj lutmey. =
> Boy: I know Bronal. Kahless defeated him at... =
> loDHom: bIro'nal vISov. jey qeylIS 'ej... =
> Grandfather: Yes, yes, but this happens before all of that. Be silent =
> and listen. The House of Bronal... =
> vavnI': HIja', 'ach qaSpa' Hochvetlh qaS lutvam. yItam'eghmoH 'ej =
> yI'Ij. bIro'nal tuq... =
maj.
> Bronal: And this warrior ... he is alone? =
> bIro'nal: toH, SuvwI'vam ... mob'a'? =
Putting a topicalising {-'e'} is an easy and grammatical way of shifting a =
noun to the start of the utterance this way: "Well, as for this warrior... =
he is alone?"
> Spy: Yes, my lord. =
> ghoqwI': HIja' jawwI'. =
> Bronal: He dispatched over 20 bandits, you say? =
> bIro'nal: nIteb cha'maH nIHwI' HoHta' qar'a'? =
> Spy: Yes, my lord. And walked away without a scratch. =
> ghoqwI': HIja' jawwI'. 'ej mejDI' rIQbe'.
> Bronal: I see. =
> bIro'nal: toH. =
> Spy: Would you like to see him for yourself? He could be brought before =
> your magnificence. =
> ghoqwI': DaqIH DaneH'a'?
"Would you like to see him for yourself?" contains a lot of emphasis on "yo=
u" and "yourself", and putting in an explicit pronoun for emphasis would re=
nder this really nicely: {DaqIH SoH DaneH'a'} "Do YOU want to meet him?"
> chaq tlhop'a'lIjDaq qemlu'.
An interesting way of putting "in front of your magnificence". :) Unfortuna=
tely, I don't think it quite works. For a start, {tlhop'a'} sounds more lik=
e "everything in front" or the like; it augments the idea of the area, not =
the person possessing it. The other thing is that in standard Klingon, loca=
tive nouns like {tlhop} don't take possessive suffixes (see KGT p.24); they=
appear in noun-noun constructions with a pronoun, so {jIH tlhopDaq} "in fr=
ont of me". {SoH tlhopDaq} is really all you need. But to render "your magn=
ificence", why not take the opportunity to use an honourific? {chaq SoH tlh=
opDaq qemlu'neS} "he may be brought before you, your honour".
> Bronal: No. If he is as powerful as you say, I will be inviting the =
> cyclone into my home. Fetch my assassins. =
> bIro'nal: ghobe'. HoSghajchu' 'e' vIvItchugh
{vIt} is "tell the truth". Would {voq} "trust" be better here? {HoSghajchu'=
'e' vIvoqchugh} "if I trust that he is so powerful"?
> vaj juHwIjDaq SuS'a' vIqem. naDev HoHwI'pu'wI' {4} yIqem. =
Remember that when the object of an imperative is plural, the appropriate p=
ronominal prefix is {tI-}; {yIqem} is "bring it!", {tIqem} is "bring them!".
(poD vay')
> {4} There must be a better way to say "assassin" =
We have a fairly rich vocabulary of verbs for killing, but {chot} "murder" =
and {chotwI'} "murderer" might be most appropriate here.
QeS =
_______________________________________________
Tlhingan-hol mailing list
Tlhingan-hol@kli.org
http://mail.kli.org/mailman/listinfo/tlhingan-hol
